50 Times Someone Actually Objected During The “Speak Now Or Forever Hold Your Peace” Portion Of The Wedding
“Should anyone present know of any reason that this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace…”
Not all wedding ceremonies include an opportunity for guests to object, but when they do, it's usually because the couple is confident that everyone present supports the union. Occasionally, however, all hell breaks loose when the officiant utters this phrase…
One curious Reddit user recently asked people to detail times guest objected to couples tying the knot, and readers flooded the replies with a variety of scandalous stories of weddings gone wrong. Enjoy reading these wild tales, as well as conversations we had with Jack Burns, Editor at Bespoke Bride, and Kathy and Danielle, Editors at The Wedding Playbook, and be sure to upvote the stories that you would have paid money to witness!
#1Groom found out that bride was cheating two days before the wedding day. He spilled the beans while exchanging the vows.
Image credits: StuntCockofGilead
#2I was at one where the Groom thanked the Bride's Ex for dying as his loss was my gain.
Didn't help the sons of his bride and ex were in attendance
Image credits: Lsd365
To gain more insight on this scandalous topic, we reached out to the experts at Bespoke Bride, and lucky for us, Editor Jack Burns was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda. First, we wanted to know if anyone from the Bespoke Bride team had ever been in attendance when a wedding was halted due to an objection. “None of us have been to a scandalous wedding where this happened, but we have heard a few stories where it did,” Jack said.
“One story that we remember was about a city wedding in London, where just as the couple exchanged their heartfelt vows, a hushed murmur swept through the crowd. A figure, dressed in a flamboyant suit, burst through the entrance, drawing everyone's attention,” he continued. “It was a long-lost friend of the groom, known for his outrageous and unpredictable behavior. The friend's voice boomed through the room, as he declared something like, ‘Stop this wedding! You can't marry her!’”
#3A woman, in her 20s at the time, objected to her mom marrying my uncle. So she started yelling, “Mom don’t marry him!” during the ceremony. The ceremony proceeded and some family on the mom’s side lead the daughter away to quit interrupting. I don’t blame her-my uncle was a lying, lazy bastard. The marriage didn’t last.
Image credits: Rabies182
#4Went to a wedding where they skipped that part because the brides adult daughter was planning to object.
Image credits: mynameizgary
“He continued to tell how he loved the bride and how they shared some secret moments in the past,” Jack went on to explain. “The room erupted into a flurry of whispers and murmurs, as guests turned to one another, shocked by the drama. The bride, tears streaming down her face, stood frozen. But then the groom stepped forward and said something like, ‘This is not the time nor the place for such declarations. You had your chance, and you let it slip away.’ The officiant, trying to restore order, intervened and asked the rude friend to leave. Reluctantly, he complied. The ceremony resumed, but the shadow of the objection lingered over the celebration.”
My uncle was getting married. Small, just a handful of family and a minister. I was videotaping.
My grandmother was not into it at all. With each line spoken by the minister, she had a cutting, sarcastic response. I could not believe it. It was so unlike her,
When that part came up, she said “I object. But does it really matter? They are going to to do it anyway.”
The minister just ignored her and proceeded, business as usual.
They were divorced within a year.
Wish I had a copy.
Image credits: jamesshine
#6I had a friend who was a minister, and the subject came up if he asked the question during ceremonies he officiated. He laughed and said no way. He basically tells the couple not to include it because it only invites a moment of anxiety at best, misery at worst.
His best story (and one of the reasons he stopped including the question) was a couple where the lead up to the wedding the couple was obviously in love. The bride to be was very smiley and happy. Day of the wedding she’s stone faced. He knows something is up because he’s never seen her like this and he asks if she is ok. “I’m fine.”
Right before the service he asks again. “I’m fine.”
He gets to the question, “Does anyone object to this union?”
The bride reaches over, grabs the maid of honor, shoves her into the bride’s spot and says, “You’re screwing him, you marry him.” And then stormed out of the church.
Image credits: FDS_MTG
Thankfully, most couples don’t need to worry about any objections today, as Jack says this tradition has largely become symbolic over time, rather than a genuine question for the guests. “In fact, many couples choose to omit this part of the ceremony altogether,” the editor noted. “Mainly because the objection portion of the ceremony was once a legal requirement to ensure there were no legal impediments to the marriage. However, in most jurisdictions, the legalities are taken care of before the wedding day, making the objection part unnecessary.”
“Secondly, weddings today tend to focus more on celebrating the love and commitment between the couple, rather than entertaining the possibility of awkward objections,” Jack continued. “Lastly, objections raised during weddings are exceptionally rare. In modern days, if someone has a legitimate objection to a marriage, they typically address it privately with the couple before the wedding day. We at Bespoke Bride would recommend omitting it to maintain a more seamless and joyful ceremony.”
#7A friend of mine has a band that plays lots of weddings and other parties. They were hired for a birthday party that turned out to be a surprise wedding. The guy surprised his gf with a proposal and wanted to have a wedding ceremony then and there. She said no and left
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#8My aunties fiance was already married (lady stood up waving marriage cert) so wedding didn't go ahead. The reception was on a long boat so we still went to that. The fiance went back to home country to sort it out and never came back.
Image credits: Chiquita4eyes
Jack went on to note that most couples do not anticipate any sort of dramatic interruptions during their wedding ceremonies today, because they are proceeding based on “a strong foundation of love, trust, and commitment, with the expectation that their day will be filled with joy and celebration.”
But if anyone out there is considering disrupting a friend or family member’s wedding, the wedding expert says that it should be approached with extreme caution and should only be considered in truly exceptional circumstances. “Ensure that you have legitimate and valid concerns, like evidence of fraud or coercion, or any other significant issue that would genuinely affect the couple's well-being.”
#9Not quite the question as asked, but too funny to not share:
Priest: "Any objections?"
Father of the bride: _lets out the hardest, loudest, most complex-sounding sneeze I've ever heard in my life, completely with involuntarily saying "ACHOOOOOO"_
Mother of the bride, hammered on champagne: "For f**k's sake, Jerry!"
It took a good five minutes for everyone to regain their composure.
Image credits: ibiacmbyww
#10I went to a wedding where the best man was replaced a week before because he banged the bride. But the wedding still went ahead just with a different best man. They are divorced now.
Image credits: Tobias---Funke
“We also recommend addressing your concerns privately with the couple before the wedding day,” Jack told Bored Panda. “If you still believe there are serious grounds for objection on the wedding day itself, it is crucial to approach the matter with sensitivity and discretion. Speak privately with the officiant or a trusted wedding organizer who can guide you on the appropriate course of action. Disrupting the ceremony should be an absolute last resort.”
“Think about the consequences, as any disruption or objection during a wedding ceremony can have significant emotional and social consequences,” the editor added. “It can cause distress and embarrassment to the couple, their families, and their guests. Be prepared for potential backlash or strained relationships resulting from your actions.”
If you’d like to learn more about wedding planning, wedding etiquette or gain some inspiration for your own big day, be sure to check out Bespoke Bride right here to hear more from the experts!
#11One of my cousins is married to literally one of the kindest and coolest dudes I have ever met. Before the wedding, her little sister was saying how “she’s marrying my best friend.” At the wedding, when the priest dude asks if anyone objects, the room is dead quiet and all you hear is a little girlish whisper “I do.” It was honestly really adorable and we all laughed, and my cousin’s husband and her little sister are still best friends.
Image credits: Lord_Banana_14
#12I dunno if it's a UK thing or even just a one specific church thing but I was told by the priest in a rehearsal that if someone objects, even as a joke, the priest is required to pause the ceremony and talk to the objector alone to discuss their concerns and decide if they have a valid objection. Like it's not a fun jokey moment, it's a real legal part of the ceremony.
He also said it used to be custom that if you raised an invalid objection you then had to pay for the wedding.
Image credits: DannySpud2
We were also lucky enough to get in touch with two more wedding experts, Kathy and Danielle, Editors at The Wedding Playbook, to hear their thoughts on the topic. Kathy and Danielle shared that, fortunately, they've never been in attendance at a wedding that was halted in a scandalous way. "It’s more common for us to hear about people who object to a marriage opting not to attend the wedding, which is a quieter but no less heart-wrenching form of protest," they told Bored Panda.
#13At his rehearsal dinner a co-workers mother toast included that his soon to be wife was a "damn dirty w***e who wasn't good enough" for her son. Folks not happy. (Video ended so didn't see the whole thing.)
At wedding which I attended his mom started to say something at the "speak now" part but was silenced by her daughter. Mom left and didn't see the rest of the ceremony.
Everything about that poor guy was drama.
Image credits: nebelhund
#14This was in America, and the wedding was in a Buddhist temple. Parents of the groom stood up and objected because they didn’t believe the bride was of the same class. They spoke in another language so most of the English speaking guests didn’t know they were objecting.
My husband was the best man and those closest to the couple knew this might happen. The Buddhist priest said he would handle it if the parents tried anything.
After the parents spoke for a while the priest said to the groom, “You’ve heard what your parents had to say, what do you want to do?” The groom replied, “I want to marry my bride.” So the priest asked the parents to leave. At this point the rest of the guests are clueing in that this was not a nice part of the ceremony, and that the parents were actually objecting, so, as the parents walked out, some of the guests were berating them saying things like, “You should be ashamed of yourself” and “How could you do that?” And even though the groom was not happy with his parents, that was very hard for him to hear.
That was 30 years ago. The couple is still married. They have two beautiful, successful children. After the groom’s mom passed away, the groom’s father came around and was involved in their lives until he died.
Image credits: Bayou_Mama
The wedding experts also shared that, "If it’s not a cultural or religious requirement, [asking for objections] is definitely one part of the wedding ceremony you can do without. It either leads to an awkward pause or a melodramatic made-for-TV moment, both of which detract from what is meant to be a happy occasion."
"Instead, the officiant can ask if the couple has the blessing of their loved ones for the marriage - but only if they know the answer will be a resounding yes!" Kathy and Danielle added.
#15My mother passed away about 15 years ago. 5 years later my dad married my now step-mother. It was an outdoor wedding on a beautiful sunny day, and during the spot where they usually ask if anyone objects, a big gust of wind came out of nowhere and knocked over some tables. Afterward, multiple people came to tell me that wind gust was my mother objecting, which I like to believe was true.
Image credits: Gbuphallow
#16My grandmother objected at my sister's wedding. My sister was a Florida based Italian Catholic and somewhat conservative individual who fell in love with a progressive New York Jew.
My Nonna said it wouldnt work and it would change one of them and she was worried about it changing her grand daughter. My parents managed to get her away from the wedding and it continued. My sister is now neither Catholic or conservative, so my Nonna was absolutely right.
Image credits: Tink2013
"Naturally, couples want to be surrounded by love on their wedding day and hope that the people they’ve invited to witness their vows are supportive of the relationship," Kathy and Danielle noted.
But they added that not everyone needs approval to go through with tying the knot. "Most would continue with their wedding plans even if there’s a chance of an objection because it’s important to them to publicly declare their commitment to one another. It’s symbolic of their decision to face all of life’s ups and downs together."
There are even ways around objections if your friends and family aren't on board. "Those who are especially worried that friends or family might disagree with their marriage often plan an elopement to ensure only positive memories of the day," Kathy and Danielle told us.
#17My mum told me she was going to pay an old boyfriend to stand up and object at my wedding. She didn’t in the end but I did cast a quick look around in the church before walking down the aisle.
Image credits: Iamclavicusvile
#18My husband's first marriage. The brother of the bride stood up and said to my husband "Say no, you can still be happy!"
They went through with the marriage, wound up divorcing with a messy break up.
Brother in law is still best friends with my husband (as far as he's concerned he gained a brother and lost a sister and is better off for it) and he never lets him forget the fact that he was right and he should have bailed lol.
Edited for clarification
Image credits: Amaevise
And if you want to object to a friend's wedding, Kathy and Danielle say that there's likely a better way to go about it. "There’s no more hurtful way to say you don’t support your friend or family member’s life choices than with an announcement on their wedding day," they told Bored Panda. "Even if you have a valid reason, we recommend addressing it in private before the event to spare the couple any embarrassment worthy of a soap opera season finale. Unless there’s a legal, moral or wellbeing concern, it might be a case of putting aside your own feelings and being happy that they’re happy in order to preserve your relationship."
If you'd like to gain even more wedding tips from the experts, as well as ideas for planning your own special day, we recommend visiting The Wedding Playbook's website right here!
#19I used to make wedding videos. Did one at an outdoor wedding spot high on one side of a valley. It had rained earlier in the day but the storms had cleared and the wedding could continue.
During the vows I don't touch the camera, just step back and let it run. So I'm spaced out waiting for the vows to finish and notice a radio tower far across the valley. Suddenly lightning hits the radio tower. I had enough time to think "Boy when the thunder gets here it'll probably loud."
I also had enough time to clue in that the minister was saying "If anyone objects to this union let him speak now or forever..." KEBLAMMMMMMMM!
Total silence in the venue. Preacher takes a second to look around and make sure everybody is alright, on one has been smote. "Well that's never happened before."
AFAIK they're still married, that was 10 years or more ago...
Image credits: curtludwig
#20I was not at the wedding, but know of a case where there was an objection, and the circumstances were quite exceptional.
When I was a detective with the Child Protection and Sexual Offences Unit, we dealt with a case involving a 14-year-old girl who had been raped by a known adult male. The first disclosure of the rape was made by her AT HIS WEDDING CEREMONY, which she attended uninvited. When the pastor asked if there were objections, she rose and said yes, she had an objection; the groom had raped her a week before. The pastor stopped proceedings and took the child to an adjacent office, where she repeated the allegation and gave more information.
Shockingly, the bride was still willing to go through with the ceremony, which was concluded while the girl waited in the office. Afterwards, the pastor took her to the local police station (Bellville South in Cape Town, South Africa), where a case was opened and the matter assigned to my unit for investigation.
We carried out the arrest at the V & A Waterfront, Cape Town the next evening (Sunday), where the groom and his friends were partying it up. The bride, of course, was left home alone, one day after the wedding.
I was blown away by the courage it took for the girl to attend the wedding ceremony alone, surrounded by the friends and family of the perpetrator, and to make the disclosure to his face in the way she did.
For those wondering how she knew so much about him and when he would be getting married; he lived in close proximity to the girl's family in Bellville South and the two families knew each other. He had siblings who attended school with her.
Image credits: Saffer13
#21Oldie but a goodie, this happened back in the 70s, this was shared to le by the guy who married my parents. It went something like this :
"does anyone object to this union?"
" I do! That's my husband!"
So they paused the wedding, the bride, groom and the woman objecting went into a small room. The woman who objected provided documentation showing the groom was still legally her husband. Apparently the couple had started divorce proceedings some time earlier but never finished. The wedding was cancelled and everyone sent home.
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#22The mom of one of the Bridesmaids got up and yelled “Yeah I object: You f*****g stole him from her!” While pointing at the bride. I’ve known the groom for a long time and by proxy the bride. I am still very good friends with them. I have never seen her more infuriated than at that moment. The bridesmaid got up from her chair and was like “I’m so, so sorry. Let me get her out of here.” The bridesmaid and the bride’s stepfather escorted the woman out of the wedding and it continued.
Image credits: Husbandaru
#23I was the best man at my bestie's wedding. Smeone that we...tolerated in our friend group, objected and said he was in love with the bride and that he was the only one that could make her hpapy. She had been nice about his feelings until then and reminded him in front of the entire ceremony that A: he could't hold down a job because he had too big of an ego, B: didn't get along with her friends because they all had something they were working on (A book, a career, a trip, volunteer job) and he had nothing so he constantly tried to downplay their accomplishments on purely presumptuous ideas and C: His idea of sex was "Blow me and I'll finger you. Night, hun." she was way more thorough and more cruel and it was a hysterical five minute ordeal. I mena he had it coming or starting s**t at her wedding. He got up and left. I was pretty sure he was crying as he walked away but no one went after him. It was both brutal and hilarious. He was like the Jar Jar Binks of our friend group: you hated him but he made you feel better because at least you weren't as bad as Peter.
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#24A relative visited one ceremony where it was asked if anyone objects, and the groom decided it's a good time for a joke and said "I do". The lady who was going to marry the couple just turned and left. They had to go through all the paperwork again and change the date. Got married, divorced in like three years if I remember correctly.
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#25I went to a Catholic wedding where, when the priest asked this question, one of the groomsmen did a VERY loud, long, throat clearing, which got everyone laughing. Everyone except for the bride's elderly Italian Grandmother who marched out of her seat and angrily hit the groomsman with her handbag and shouted at him in Italian!
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#26I wanted to pay a local actor to burst in into my wedding, shout "I object! I love the bride!" and then we each pull swords and sword fight up and down the aisle. In the end I would win and the ceremony would wrap up as planned.
My wife did not think this idea was awesome so we just had a regular wedding instead.
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#27In my cousin's wedding her friend said "I object" because she was not invited to the wedding. She was kicked out of the wedding.
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#28My brother's wedding the wife's older brother objected because of political differences lol. He was asked to leave by the bride's father.
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#29I objected. I took giving my sister away literally. I wasn't the brightest 3 year old.
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#30I was at one. Didn’t know what happened as I was in the back. The bride runs out to the limo her family after her. I said to the person next to me Cold feet? She’s like oh no I thought this might happen. Her ex is here. We went outside. He’d apparently come into a lot of money he came to the side door front of the church said he objected because he’s rich and wants her back. She paused too long for the grooms liking he said Fuvk you both. She ran. Last I saw they were at the limo with her. She was crying. Have no idea how it ended but there was no wedding. We went to the reception no bridal party. We ate drank danced and left. ??♀️
#31Not a wedding, but at a funeral someone objected the death.
At my uncle’s funeral, his ex wife and a local church [cult] leader tried to raise him from the dead. We were all sitting there like normal people at a normal funeral and she walks up to the casket and starts yelling, “James Lester, raise up!” I didn’t know she was there or I would’ve prepared myself for shenanigans. Also I didn’t know my uncle’s middle name was Lester, so please imagine the confusion. So she and the cult leader are literally yelling at my uncle’s body. Not surprisingly, my uncle refused to resurrect himself. They were escorted out.
I’ve actually never told this story because it makes my family look insane.
Image credits: HughSteele
#32When my sister got married, they had the pastor skip over that part. I think she knew none of us could stand him. I don't think anyone would have spoken up to object, but the unity candle WOULD NOT light. So, in a way, I feel like that was God's way of objecting... or just irony at its best.
Divorced about 8 years later after the abusive cheating a*****e was found out. So glad he is gone.
#33I worked a wedding where one of the moms objected, but I think the groom knew that the parent was going to say something, so they just responded with, "Oh sit down, (parents name), we knew you didn't like this a year ago and clearly we're not going to change our minds today." The wedding continued like nothing happened, but the mom was lowkey shunned and people avoided her at the reception.
#34This will sound absolutely stupid but when I was a kid, my deeply religious aunt had her wedding at a local church. During the "objecting" part, lightning struck very near the church. I remember to this day how the following thunder was so loud, that the fancy windows of the church started rattling.
Well, the timing of the strike was very unfortunate for my uncle because my aunt took this as a sign of a god objecting to her marriage and called the wedding off on the spot.
Needless to say, they married on the same day year later and this time without "objection from a god". They are still married to this day.
#35Yes, at my cousin's, the bride's ex showed up and when he stood up to object my uncles grabbed him and bum-rushed him out of the church and gave him a tune-up in the parking lot. Catholic wedding, of course.
#36Heard that my father's girlfriend objected to him marrying my step-monster but was obviously OK with it after the honeymoon because they kept dating for years.
I was only 2 at that time. Heard this story years later the night her and my mother reconnected at parent/teacher night. My mother being the parent and her being my sister's English teacher
#37My buddy wasn’t fully rejected at the altar, which sounds weird but I’ll explain.
Without too much “back in the day” talk I’ll just say the groom was/is a good friend of mine I’d known since middle school (7th grade).
He’d met this awesome gal and they were slated to be married in our then early 30’s.
Come the wedding day and it’s almost a high school reunion of sorts (we attended a smallish private school), everyone stoked to see our grade school pal get married.
We’re all seated outside waiting for the bride to come out and a reasonable amount of time goes by. People are just carrying on, catching up etc. I’ve got a flask and sharing it with people. The groom goes inside to see what’s up..
More time goes on, then some more, then my flask is empty and I want to go reload at the car but think better of it.
Then the groom comes back out to address everyone and let’s us know that “this isn’t happening today, the bride doesn’t want to go through with it. We’re still together and everything but now isn’t the time….” then goes on to encourage everyone to eat the food, it’s already paid for etc.
Here we are about 5 years later and they’re still together but not married. No harm, no foul I guess?
#38Was MoH to BFF. One of the groomsmen thought it would be funny to raise an objection. He did not understand that, by law, all proceedings had to be stopped and "investigated." Meaning the officiant had to take him aside to question him. He had the audacity to keep the "joke" going until the officiant said that he would not continue and the wedding would be called off. Both sets of parents and multiple guests also had to be questioned to confirm the objection was uncalled for. It took over an hour. The wedding scheduled after was set back 30 minutes - their guests started arriving while all this was going on. It was a huge mess. Dude thought it was hilarious. I clocked him with my fancy, dyed special for the day shoe the minute the (shortened) photoshoot was over. He was asked to not attend the reception. Bride & groom feared for his safety after I whacked him. They dropped him as a friend immediately. They will celebrate their 30th anniversary this June.
Also note, this situation began the new tradition in my family of using Quaker Self-Uniting (available in Pennsylvania) marriage licenses and having a loved one officiate at the ceremony. It basically means that the couple is married the moment they and their witnesses sign and mail their license to the municipality. They are already married when the ceremony takes place. The question of an objection is not a part of the ceremony.
Edit: changed a word for clarity
#39Happily married man here, no objections at my wedding which one one had surprised me considering how much of a twaffle my wife’s stepmom is.
But on the other hand, if she had opened her mouth at least half a dozen of my female relatives including my Sister would have dragged her out of the church and beat her on the sidewalk.
#40I used to work for a very high end wedding place and worked 100's of weddings and never got to witness a total disaster. Sex in the coat room was about the best it got, but the word "objection" wasn't in play in this situation.
#41My MIL was/is a very emotionally and physically abusive person and really worked over my wife throughout the years. She didn't make a stink at the wedding, but she made sure that anyone near her, including my parents and myself, knew just how much she didn't like me and that she would make sure it didn't last. Tangentially she nearly got her wish. But despite all of that mess my wife and I are still married and my wife is now low contact with her mom.
#42I have a really weird family.
Half of my family (my dad's side) are east coast WASPs. We're talking tweed jackets, prep schools, taking a brandy in the study, riding lessons... the whole kit and caboodle.
The other half of my family (my mom's side) are East Texas hillbillies. I have an uncle who's gotten a DUI while riding a four-wheeler in *two separate incidents.* I have a cousin who is currently in prison because he tried to rob the tropical fish store where he worked. They arrested him when he tried to come in for his next shift.
I went to a wedding of a cousin of mine from the hillbilly side once. First off, I never knew the whole *"Does anyone object to this union?"* thing was real. I thought that was s**t they only do on TV. Anyways, when the preacher asked that, the bride's mother made some noise and then excused herself, leaving the ceremony. She didn't say yes or anything-- but she definitely made some weird noise at a super inopportune time and then stood up and walked out.
My aunt (the *groom's* mom) took that as a sign of disrespect and left to confront her.
Yes. You heard that right. In the middle of her *son's wedding vows*, she decided to leave to go confront the bride's mother for making a noise. I'm not proud of these people.
The ceremony ends and the bride and groom are being ushered out of the church and into a limo to take them to their reception... and out in the parking lot, my aunt and the bride's mother are locked up like two wrestlers.
Then I hear someone shout *"OH, COME ON! YALL JUST QUIT IT!"* and I turn around to see my uncle and the bride's father are now fighting in the foyer of the church and the f*****g preacher is trying to break them up.
To the surprise of *abso-f*****g-lutely* no one, that marriage lasted two whole years.
#43My cat was my best man and when our friend who ordained our wedding asked if there were any objections he let out a long a*s meow
#44haven’t been to personally but my mom said that her soon-to-be MIL stood up when the priest said “speak now or forever hold your peace”. upon being told that I never let it go.
My mom worked her a*s off and got all her six kids into college. Screw that old lady, some people just can’t appreciate others. To this day she doesn’t like my mom but TBH their whole family never deserved my mom to begin with.
Can anyone relate?
#45Not exactly an objection but the wedding was on a boat ( no one could leave) and the groom was Jewish and marrying a Mexican catholic woman. The groom neglected to tell his family it was a full catholic wedding and the groom’s family stood up and pitched a fit when they realized the groom was going to take communion. The uncle who sponsored his bar mitzvah stood up and announced that the groom was a disgrace to the family and walked downstairs. The reception was a shitshow
#46I perform weddings but I do not give the option. I tell the bride and groom ahead of time that the guests have accepted the invitation to your wedding to bless it. If they have a problem with your decision they need to tell you long before that day. I didn't really think people gave that option outside of Hollywood. It just invites trouble.
I take a similar approach for funerals. While I let families give as many eulogies as they want to for their deceased loved one, they must approve each speaker ahead of time. I do not pass the mic. I don't want some estranged lover or drunk uncle getting up and making a fool of the family or the deceased person. So far, so good.
#47Well, sort of. It was staged, pre arranged, and the minister was warned ahead of time.
The couple said they wanted to make the ceremony more interesting. So they had a friend object, declaring his love for the bride in an over the top dramatic speech.
The best man (my husband) stabbed the guy with a stage dagger, he played dead, and two of the other groomsmen dragged his limp body away. The wedding proceeded.
I have to say, it was pretty awesome. The bride and groom are still happily married 30+ years later.
#48I was at a small ceremony indoors, maybe 30 people tops listening. When the minister asked for any objections, a picture of the bride’s dead grandmother that was hanging on the wall fell to the ground with a loud thump. We looked at each other but the minister finished anyway. Divorced within a year.
#49My best friend (males) and I drew somewhat apart during college, then grew closer after college. He fell into a group of friends who were a little wilder than me. I don't blame him. College is supposed to be fun. I missed out. That's my fault because I did a five year program that got me my BA and MBA in short order.
After school ended, he was asked by a new friend to be his best man. I knew the guy and his fiance secondhand. He was a bit of an ogre and she was cute, a bit mousy. I wasn't at the wedding, but the big day comes and we all go about our lives.
It was the 90s and I worked that Saturday (yes, "Office Space" culture was real then). I go out to our watering hole that night and there was my best friend, drinking a double whiskey in a disheveled tux.
"Good wedding? How was the reception grub?", I asked.
"No wedding. No reception. I ate dinner at Applebee's by myself.", he said.
The bride told the limo driver to take her for a few big laps. She eventually showed, gathered her family around her, and told the groom it was not happening today or ever. The physical and mental abuse was too much and she was too far into a drug habit he pushed on her and was going to seek help.
Now understand, only a few at the wedding knew any of the abuse or drug abuse was going on. The ogre went into a rage, tried to attack her, and got repelled by the better men and women in the crowd.
She got her help and self-confidence back and married a great guy a few years later. Three kids, almost 30 years together. Her would-be husband kept up his bad habits and ended up killing his girlfriend and himself in a drug-fueled murder/suicide in our 30s.
Still shocks me to this day. My best friend has been pretty much straight and narrow since. It sobered him up in many ways.